The Ugly Double Standards Of Armchair Critics

In a statement soon after the Zimbabwe National Army lead operation “Restore Legacy” ,Numsa, general secretary Irvin Jim,said;’The army in Zimbabwe has taken over power through a military coup and no amount of concealment of this most obvious of facts can change the ugly reality of the unconstitutional military takeover of power in Zimbabwe.

The Ugly Double Standards Of Armchair Critics

The  first stolen elections from the year 2002 to date ,the Zimbabwean opposition politicians have been crying foul over the manner in which the ZanuPf party with aid of the army, especially where the 2008 election were concerned. Where were the likes of Mr Jim,the catch phrase then was ‘Zimbabweans should solve their own internal problems. ’The army is surely part and parcel of the Zimbabwean populace so why then is it wrong now that they have initiated the resolving of the internal problem that the likes of Mr Jim alluded to earlier, dare hide behind the constitutionality of the act. Where were they when the constitution was being abused in the name of uncle Bob.I guess some animals are more equal than others huh ala the pigs in THE ANIMAL FARM.

We have had to endure harassment,false accusations,imprisonment,trumped up charges of undermining the dignity of the President,Treason ,just to mention a few and we had to do it without any support from the likes of Mr Jim and his ilk. Now that we have the courage to throw off the yoke that has been around our collective necks for the last 37 YEARS please leave us be so we can solve our Internal problem Uncle Bob.

Included in the group of worthless critics and organizations is surely the AU and Sadc,who can forget the ill-advised Quiet Diplomacy practiced by one Thabo Mbeki, when he was the President of South Africa. It never bore any fruit save to entrench the despotic rule of Uncle Bob. Their main concern is self-aggrandizement and the stroking of their collective egos. We say to hell with you, we are living in the moment and enjoying it whilst we can .We will not listening to your doomsday prophecies, We will reclaim our lives come what may.

At the time of writing this  article a lot has come and gone ,another disputed election; but then that is the nature of ‘The Beast’ isn’t it.An election by its nature is a dispute .So the fact that one of the contestants is disputing the results may just be put down to “sour grapes” or is it?Anyway we were able to exercise our right to choose our leader and now the arduous task of undoing the rot that set in during the past regime’s misrule begins.At the end of the day it is the individual citizens putting their collective shoulders to the wheel which will get us out of thus rut not some know it all somewhere hiding behind his laptop of in front of a TV camera for 20 seconds of fame.

What's In A Name

‘What’s in a name,that which we call a rose will smell just as sweet if called by another name’,William Shakespear wrote.

What's In A Name

Traditionally ,our names are supposed to depict some happening in our parents’ lives,Reval,Sarudzai,Makandionei,Dambudzo to name just a few of the names that hang around the necks of some Zimbos like a tire-necklace ,for those of you who are not aware, this is a sadistic form of punishment devised by the South Africans where they pour petrol into a used tire ,put it around a person before setting it alight. The victim dies an agonizing death. Unfortunately, most of these people with these traditional names somehow actually suffer as in the case of one called Nhamo (Suffering).Many a time these children with the hard-luck inspired names change these names to “acceptable” ones once they get a chance or when they start going to secondary school because we know that teenagers can be cruel if you don’t have a cool name, one can end up being bullied mercilessly.

This is the reason why some Zimbos end up with names like Kubi,an Anglicized version of the name Kubvoruno,which was deemed uncool by its owner. Usually we are in the habit of having two names one given at birth which is normally in the child’s mother tongue ,then another which is Christian inspired for the church baptism. These are the names that are normally adopted once one starts going to school or when they want to appear ‘cool’ names like; John,James,Peter,or Mischeck. Many a time these guys  with the ‘found names’ tend to ignore those who grew up with them should they accidentally meet and greet them using the hated “African” names.Of later there has been an upsurge of cool names which are inspired by celebrates like;Beyonce,Ronaldo,Alisha to name but A few.

A lot has been said about the need for our people to be conscious of where they come from by not many can withstand the need for them to appear cool in the eyes of their colleagues and peers.Peer pressure applies even too the aged,so a lot of less hardy types will cower to have their traditional names called in circles where they want to be regarded as being in with the program. In Lesotho, where I had the pleasure of living for quite some time ,a lot of children have English inspired traditional names like ;Paramente from Parliament,Lepolisa from a policeman or Lesole from the word soldier in English.I was unable to establish the thinking behind the names but suffice to say quite a few giggles were stifled at the mention of these names.But most importantly ,that is a nation which is in love of its culture,to the extent that most of the given names are in Sesotho- the mother tongue.

I rest my case, you be the judge.

The Power Of Positive Thoughts

I was fortunate to get the Pdf of the book; THINK AND GROW RICH  by Napolean Hill, from one member of a motivational group that I belong to, on Whatsapp.  After reading a few pages of the first chapter ,I have discovered the real reason why a lot of the ventures I have started have failed.

The Power Of Positive Thoughts

 I have discovered that we are what we are because of the thoughts that we have in our heads.In the year 2010,with just 500 rands in my pocket, I was fortunate enough to start a High school and within a month I had managed to have over a hundred students ,eight fully  employed members of staff.This was a result of the fact that I had been employed three years previous to that at a private school that was run by a man who was so irresponsible that he would spent the money that was  paid by the students as his private income instead of the fact that it was money for the running of the business. When later on in 2009 he had problems paying us our salaries ,I THOUGHT OF STARTING MY OWN SCHOOL.That thought was the seed that lead me to pool my resources and and talk to the disgruntled members of staff about my plans of starting my own schools. Most of them were really enthusiastic  about joining me. Because  I was determined and knew what I wanted, I was able to advertise ,register and start the school at the beginning of 2010.An investor came on board after I told him my vision, he put up the deposit for the premises which we were renting and the school was able to pay him  back within the first month of operating as well as pay rentals ,allowances for members of staff as well as buy stationery for the day-to- day running of the school.

After running the school for two years and having experienced the stress of fighting with my “partner” in the venture ,who would make it a point to sabotage me at every turn, I threw in the towel and walked away from the baby I had conceived in my mind and nurtured to its birth. With hindsight , I have discovered that the course of action I took was not the best one ,I should have stuck it out and found ways of running the “partner “ out of the business instead of giving up so easily. I was guilty of failing to persist and sustain the burning desire that I had when I thought of the business venture in the first place. Despite the fact that my erstwhile partner had turned into my enemy, I should have soldiered on.

Interestingly, He did try to run the venture on his own for a while but I was later told that it folded spectacularly. He did not have the vision nor the desire to carry out the project.How many of us have started projects only to abandon them at the first sign of trouble. Statistics show that most small businesses fail in the first two years of inception,This the period were one finds that there are a lot of teething problems ;from lack of funds to run the project, lack of expertise and maybe not having the clientele for the business.

The Case Of Mistaken Identity

Whilst standing outside one of the major banks in Harare, I was accosted by a young lady with a toddler in tow, at first I thought that she was one of the ladies who have perfected the art of begging,who regularly swindle gullible people out of their hard earned cash by telling them tall tales of hard luck so that they can part with a few coins.

The Case Of Mistaken Identity

Imagine my amusement when she asked me whether I was a Mr Chirume from Mutare.I shook my head with a chuckle to ease obvious embarrassment. She apologized and went on her way but it got me thinking of the time IN THE KINGDOM IN THE SKY(LESOTHO) ,When I had a similar case. I saw someone whose striking resemblance to my late cousin brother had me make a double take.

My brother, rest his departed soul had passed on a couple of years before the chance encounter with his “twin “ in Lesotho.He had been ill for quite some time before his demise. Two days before he passed on ,I went to the taxi rank where he normally picked up passengers. I was informed by his colleagues that he had not been coming for work for quite some time. I proceeded to his place of residence and found his mother giving him a bath (this was a grown man of about forty years),his wife had deserted him because of the illness which finally took him to his grave.

On the day I saw the person who looked so similar to him, I took a double take, my mind told me that it could not be possible but my heart skipped a beat all the same. For a few seconds there I think I believed in reincarnation. I believe I had not fully processed his departure then. 

I finally was able to put the case to bed after thinking about it for a while and seeing the absurdity of my thoughts.But lately I have learnt  that there is an urban myth that somewhere in the world there is someone who looks exactly like you,Science says such a thing does not exist but bearing in mind the fact that there are over Seven billion on earth at the moment the the chance that someone might look like you out there can not be ruled out.

Be Aware Of Whom You Are Dealing With part2

In the year 2000,an incident happened which opened my eyes to the fact that at times I trust too much ,too easily.

Be Aware Of Whom You Are Dealing With

Having  been living and working in Lesotho for two years , I had made friends among people I used to play Volleyball with.One of them Mandla(not his real name) approached me and told me he had a girlfriend who worked at this place where they assembled mobile phones .Two days later he came to me with an almost new mobile phone which he claimed he had got from his girlfriend ,he professed that he was having problems operating it ,I did the best I could to try and help him get a grip on the operations of the phone. Eventually he suggested that we exchange phones as the he insisted that the one I had was easy for him to operate. He then said for an extra 500 rand he would give the phone and he would have the one I had.

I gave Mandla my phone and a hundred rand note I have with the promise that I would give the remainder of the cash at the en d of the month .Somehow I insisted that we draw up a simple agreement to this effect. Two weeks after the exchange I got a call from a stranger who asked to meet with me ,when we did he turned out to be a police officer who informed me that the phone I was using had been stolen and the owner of the mobile phone was also there.I took out the phone and recounted how it came to be in my possession. They suggested that we go to the home of the guy I was talking about so that we could confirm my story.When we arrived and Mandla was confronted ,he readily confirmed my story ,the officer then suggested that we go to the police station so that we could give our statements ,I was surprised when we got there to be informed that I was an accused person in the case and I was then put in police cells over the weekend.What really made the matter painful for me was the fact that Mandla was set free as he claimed to be below eighteen years of age and the fact that his cousin was a police detective at the station.

I spent a harrowing two days and three nights in the police cells and was taken to face the magistrate at Maseru Magistrate Courts on the Monday,the prosecutor who was xenophobic and abusive once he heard that I was a foreigner ,took to me into the chambers of one magistrate who asked for my passport and a thousand rand bail, I was told to report to the main police station every last day of the month until my case was heard.The first time I went to report for my first remand ,after the prosecutor started running his mouth about the fact that we foreigners came to their country to impregnate their sisters and left them with babies which they had to raised on their own ,I let loose my frustration and berated him about the fact that he was not being objective and looking at the merits of the case. Subsequent to this ,whenever I would go for a new remand date ,he would disappear and later tell his colleague to inform me of the new date.After a year of these cat and mouth games ,I had tried on my own to go and see the magistrate in charge of my case,I ended up just abandoning the case and just stopped going to the court. I was however lucky in that Mandla’s aunt was able to return my mobile phone after I came back from court after the initial remand.

This one of the things that have turned me into the cynic I now am,It now takes me time to trust people.I am no longer the gullible person I was then.If something looks too good to be true,then its too good to be true.

A Zimbos Perspective Of Life In The Diaspora

Whilst some will embrace you with open arms, there are subtle nuances that will throw you off balance if you are observant enough.

A Zimbos Perspective Of Life In The Diaspora

These are found in the terms that most indigenous people will use in referring to one such as the following used by the Sotho speaking inhabitants of South Africa and Lesotho;’makoere-koere,batsoakantle,bo my friend,bakhotsi,bo Rathuthu.If ones grasp of the local language is not that good then people will go to town ,gossiping about one in their faces.Some not so pleasant experiences will be when one meets someone who has a score to settle with a perceived enemy,who is accused of having stolen a girlfriend or a prospective job.That or the fact that you are found not to be light skinned enough to qualify as a Mosotho.Half the time the terms ‘Ke Lesotho moo' thrown about ,there is normally open hostility .Coupled with these would be questions like ;’why don’t you vote Mugabe out’ or ‘Ke Lesotho moo ,kutlang haeno’

Most people have developed a thick skin as they can hardly win all the arguments started by people who have very low self esteem or are simply not educated enough to realize the benefits that most countries gain from the economic refugees that settle in the various countries. Most of the people who are predominantly found in the countries neighboring  Zimbabwe are quite well educated and have skills that they can offer. Unfortunately, most of them end up not necessarily working in their areas of specialization but the fact that they have been through tertiary education makes them very malleable to adapt and operate quite efficiently in any given task they find themselves in so that they can put bread on their tables .

The Case Of Mistaken Identity

Whilst standing outside one of the major banks in Harare, I was accosted by a young lady with a toddler in tow, at first I thought that she was one of the ladies who have perfected the art of begging,who regularly swindle gullible people out of their hard earned cash by telling them tall tales of hard luck so that they can part with a few coins.

Imagine my amusement when she asked me whether I was a Mr Chirume from Mutare.I shook my head with a chuckle to ease obvious embarrassment. She apologized and when on her way but it got me thinking of the time IN THE KINGDOM IN THE SKY(LESOTHO) ,When I had a similar case. I saw someone whose striking resemblance to my late cousin brother had me make a double take.

My brother, rest his departed soul had passed on a couple of years before the chance encounter with his “twin “ in Lesotho.He had been ill for quite some time before his demise. Two days before he passed on ,I went to the taxi rank where he normally picked up passengers. I informed by his colleagues that he had not been coming for work for quite some time. I proceeded to his place of residence and found his mother giving him a bath (this was a grown man of about forty years),his wife had deserted him because of the illness which finally took him to his grave.

On the day I saw the person who looked so similar to him, I took a double take, my mind told me that it could not be possible but my heart skipped a beat all the same. For a few seconds there I think I believed in reincarnation. I believe I had not fully processed his departure then. I finally was able to put the case to bed after thinking about it for a while and seeing the absurdity of my thoughts. 

Friendship

This past week has been emotionally taxing.I learnt of the passing on of two people I regarded very highly.

Friendship

The first person whose death I learnt about was Stanford,we went to school together and were joined by our common bond; the cruel teasing that we got from our colleagues  at high school.I was the tall ungainly boy from the rural Manicaland who did not know his way around town, whilst my friend was an Albino.Naturally we gravitated towards each other and found comfort in each others company.Most weekends ,if we did not have some chores to do at home we would visit and hung-out.All throughout high school the friendship grew and when we went our separate ways to pursue different careers,it survived.We were to meet later after we both married and were able to introduce our young families to each other,only to lose track again when I migrated.When I came back I looked for my friend without any success until last weekend when I went to his parents home where I met his brother's son who was very surprised that I was looking for his late uncle.The news floored me,never in my wildest dream did I envisage that my friend was late.

I knew Mrs Lebesa during my time in Lesotho and she was able to help me immensely on two different occassions, imagine my surprise then when I learnt that she had also passed on,this from the Whatsapp status of her granddaughter.To make matters worse was the fact that I had been thinking about calling her and had even cropped one photo in which she was celebrating her granddaughters graduation from college.

The lessons learnt therefore is that life is too short and one should communicate with their friends and relatives as often as possible lest one is left rowing the missed opportunity.

Embracing One's Cellulite

Most Basotho women are an African man's dream;full bodied, light in complexion and they love their food.

Embracing One's Cellulite

What I personally loved was their openness.They can discuss  anything and most are not afraid to argue their point.Most modern women will go on weight watching ventures ,were they starve themselves to conform to the dictates of the Media ;print and electronic. Not the typical Mosotho cause she will tell you that she is beautiful,'kemotle kenale li hips' loosely translated to mean I am beautiful because I have bulging hips.As we all know most of the heaviness around a lady's hips ,stomach and butt are a result of cellulite.

The typical Sesotho diet of 'motooho' a sour thick porridge brewed from ground sorghum flour which is boiled and allowed to cool then drunk either in the morning or during the day together with wheat bread prepared the traditional way maybe the source of the ample bodies that most Basotho women have.The fact that they embrace their unique appearance is in my opinion quite commendable given the copy-cats that now fill the African continent; where anything foreign is embraced wholeheartedly at the detriment of our Africanness and a few cases of bulimia have also been reported among Africans, which is a crying shame really.

The Quirky Stories From Lesotho

I spent quite some time in The Kingdom In The Sky and got my full share of some of their wacky behavior.

Basotho Women

Most residential suburbs do not have inside plumbing so most people use the longdrop toilets  a bit removed from the main residence.Where I come from,people visit the toilets ,do their business and leave .Not the Basotho women ,I noticed some accompanying each other to the john deep in conversation and continue this whilst one is on the inside reliving themselves.The first time I saw this I thought maybe it was a once off and the people doing it had some very important business to discuss,but I noticed that it would hasppen often.It is actually a norm where one finds ladies discussing anything from politics to marital problems like cheating husbands whilst one was standing guard like a guard protecting the national treasure and the other would be in the toilet.

Are You A Cannibal?

I was asked this question quite a lot during my travels in Lesotho.One of the most hilarious tales i ever heard was the fact that people North of the Limpopo river are cannibals.

Are You Are A Cannibal?

I love my country,failed economy and all.It has the highest literacy rate in Africa.I contributed a bit to this statistic, the tale of which will be written about at a later date. One can pardon me therefore for being a bit defensive when the assertion was made that our country was full of cannibals.

Most of the Basotho i met with would regale me with story of a Mosotho who married a foreigner,went to visit the husband's country of origin and was forced to marry a baboon.I tried to explain that this was impossible, to no avail.What I later discovered was that there was a lot of uninformed stories about Africa.You could have thought you were in Europe or the Americas, the lack of knowledge their is about Africa in the countries south of the Limpopo.In Lesotho this would have been perpetuated by the fact that History is not taught in the schools.Those schools which teach it

In The Kingdom In The Sky

The first time I arrived in the country ,Lesotho,I was really impressed.It was the middle of May and it was bone-chilling cold.

Students learning

My friend ,who had generously agreed to show me the way , lead me to a hostel where other foreigners lived.What I noticed within days is the proud sense of belonging among the local people.Their love for their country,language,and their culture.Whilst quite a few would try to communicate in English,they made it a point to remind one that one is in Lesotho therefore one had to learn Sesotho,the local language.On the whole, the people are very friendly and welcoming.

Since more than half of the people one meets tells one to learn the local language,I went to the biggest bookshop in Maseru and bought a handbook of English and Sesotho translations.Within three months I could speak the language well.A lot of the people  I first met, when I did not know how to speak Sesotho, were amazed.What I discovered is that, if you love something ,then it will grow and you will succeed at it .The fact that I was  not afraid of making mistakes helped a lot.I had a group of young children children around nine and ten years old who would correct me and teach me the proper pronunciation,by the end of my sixth month in Lesotho, I could  hold my own in a simple conversation.As I write,I can safely say that I am proficient in the language since I can even interpret the meanings of idioms and some obscure expressions.

The essence of what I am trying to say is ,when one learns a language they make it their own.They then use it when they please.There is nothing more rewarding than seeing people's faces when they realise that as a foreigner in their country ,you can communicate in the local language
.Opportunities opened up for me and my fellow countrymen ,who had not bothered to learn the language quickly realised their folly and started learning too.